We had been together for 6 years. SIX YEARS!! Friday was her last day and I was in tears.
I made her a thank you card from me, T and Bootsy. She was appreciated it and cried too. She is only going to Fredericksburg, but it does not matter....I now have to learn and bond with a new oncologist.
I am confused as to why I am not motivated to finish a project. I know I can do this, I have to find my motivation and push through this quagmire of doubt. I MUST!!
Father's Day. Today is the 18th year that Ray C. Williams is not here to celebrate Father's Day with us. Eighteen Years.
Love letter to Daddy.
Daddy, you were a complicated man. At times you were cruel and at times loving. You showed me how a man should treat his wife. You should me how a man should support his family. You also showed me, what I should not tolerate in a man. You showed me that a true man, can and should own up to his mistakes and his transgressions. Daddy, you were not a perfect man, but you were perfect for our family.
At 50 years old, I can giggle at your craziness and wonder at your strength. I now know that your mistakes, were from you inability to manage some things, some situations, some stuff. I know that the bottom line was that you did your BEST to take care of your family. You and Mommy planned to send your 4 children to college and you did it. You were savvy and slick . I loved that about you. You laughed loudly and smiled brightly. I loved that about you. You took risk and owned up to your mistakes. I loved that about you. You could walk into a room and capture an audience. I loved that about you. You were friendly and knew how to be a friend. I loved that about you. Your word was your bond. I loved that about you. You had the ability to go from the shot house to the white house with out missing a beat. I loved that about you. You knew how to party. I loved that about you. You worked 2 or 3 or 4 jobs to care for your children. I loved that about you. You believed in helping others. I loved that about you.
You loved your wife. Oh, did you love your wife. I loved that about you. You were hard on your children. Now, I understand, why. You wanted your children to be the best. You wanted your children to have the intestinal fortitude to withstand any and every thing that may come their way. You were proud of your children. You loved your children and Daddy, we loved you.
I had hoped to find a man, like you. I did. Daddy, you would have loved my husband. He is an amazingly
complicated man. He is just right for me and because of you, I had the tools to love such a great man.
Daddy, not a day goes by that I do not laugh at one of your antics or tell one of your stories.
I get it now. Despite your mistakes. Despite some of the challenging ways that you handled some situations. None of them injured me. Nope sure didn't. Instead they strengthened me. They gave me a foundation. The reason why they strengthen me, is because your love and admiration for your family overcame your mistakes. You may have been a challenging man, but by God, you were the best daddy, this girl ever had.
I love you, Daddy. I love you fiercely. You were fine, fine man. I miss you and will raise a glass of Johnnie Walker today, to your memory.
Love,
Sissy
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